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July 2003 News Archive

Oh, what a lovely surprise!

Posted by John Hoare. Wednesday 30th July 2003. Again.

G&T News logoWhat have we here? An unexpected update? Well, there's a few bits and pieces to tell you about. Firstly, Natalie Rosen has informed us that repeats of the first series are on UK Gold, starting Friday 8th August at 11:50pm. Surely you all have it on DVD by now, but if you don't, here's another chance to see what you're missing. And Norman F from NOTBBC's forums has inadvertently given us news in the form of this article about The Crouches. All we can do is agree with The Commission for Racial Equality: "It is a sign of how far British television still has to go that the BBC planning to run a sitcom based around a black family is in itself a matter of news interest."

Next: shame overload. I-I-I-sorry. Kate H got in contact with us to remind us about Big Blake - and, lo and behold, he's run a couple of news stories that we and all the other Dwarf fansites missed. Gah. Firstly, there's these lovely laser etched Starbugs from The Stamp Centre. Two versions are available: a large ornamental one for £24.95, and a smaller keyring version that lights up in green, costing £7.95. These are obviously fucking beautiful, and I need them immediately.

Secondly, he mentions that the Corgi Red Dwarf and Starbug models are now avaliable to preorder from Collectiques. They also have an offer of both for £9.99, along with little Lister and Rimmer figures. Lovely, and I'll even spare you the rant about the Re-mastered Red Dwarf, because I'm feeling tired. Incidentally, I'd not have gone into all this in so much detail, but just pointed you directly towards the news items on Big Blake - but irritatingly, he's disabled right-clicking, and I can't be arsed pissing around getting round it. Gah.

An extra content update tomorrow, as I'm in a good mood; and Ian's Newsround is on Friday this week. He's coming round to bum me this weekend, so you'll see the fruits of our labours on Sunday. Which will hopefully be something more than a trickle of spunk running down my leg.

Orange Crouchless Panties

Posted by John Hoare. Wednesday 30th July 2003.

Publicity photograph of The Crouches. Danny Not Included."Married life comes under the spotlight in BBC ONE's new late night comedy showcasing the best of black British talent. Brace yourself for The Crouches!" So says the BBC press release about the new Autumn season on BBC ONE. And in the Press Pack (1.32 MB, PDF) it has a section on The Crouches; the upcoming new sitcom with a certain Danny John-Jules in the cast. In case you can't be arsed downloading it, the following info is given:

Robbie Gee, Jo Martin, Rudolph Walker and Mona Hammond star in an upbeat, contemporary comedy series for BBC One which takes an intimate, yet humorous, view of the trials and tribulations of a family living in Walworth, south-east London.
Childhood sweethearts Roly Crouch (Robbie Gee) and Natalie (Jo Martin) have been married for 18 years. With two demanding teenagers, Aiden and Adele, plus live-in parents Langley (Rudolph Walker) and Sylvie (Mona Hammond), the pressure on the Crouch household sometimes reaches boiling point. Natalie’s best friend, Lindy, and Roly’s workmates, Bailey and Ed, all add to the fun.
The cast also includes: Akemnji Ndifornyen (from Dominic Savage’s award-winning 2002 drama, Out Of Control), Ony Uhiara (Waking The Dead, The Vice), Danny John-Jules (Red Dwarf, Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels), Don Warrington (Manchild, Rising Damp), Llewella Gideon (The Real McCoy, Absolutely Fabulous) and Jimmy Akingbola (Roger Roger, Doctors).
Writer Ian Pattison is best known for creating and writing nine series of the multi-award-winning Rab C Nesbitt. The Crouches is directed by Nick Wood (award-winning director of Black Books, Kerching and Goodness Gracious Me), and produced by Stephen McCrum (Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps) and Carlton Dixon (Blouse And Skirt, The Real McCoy).

Of course, I wouldn't be doing my job properly if I didn't also point out that Don Warrington excellently played Commander Binks in Holoship. And Carlton Dixon was Associate Producer on TMWRNJ, and was a bloody nice bloke at the recordings. It looks like Danny isn't one of the main cast, but is still a regular. As we said when we first reported on this, let's hope the show is good; BBC ONE desperately needs a good sitcom.

Next, t-shirt news! The Red Dwarf Shop UK has a new design avaliable to preorder now. Due to be released on the 31st July, it's a plain black t-shirt with a small Red Dwarf logo on the front. It looks gorgeous (see a picture here), and what with this and the Skutter Concept design, Dwarf t-shirts seem to have taken a promising new direction. We'll have reviews of the new designs soon.

And finally, the report on Memorabilia is indeed up, along with piccies of my ugly face, and Ian's rather more attractive one. I'm afraid our promised new section has been postponed, but not for long. Poor little navbar. Never mind. Ian's Newsround will be on Friday, and there will be a bumper content update on Sunday.

Rob Grant does some fucking work

Posted by John Hoare. Tuesday 29th July 2003.

Incompetence cover. LOOK, IT'S SPELT WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 Or, rather, has been fucking working. With all the fuss about the upcoming movie and DVD releases, it's easy to forget that Rob is trucking along doing his own completely-non-Dwarf-related things (although we haven't forgotten that he did at one point promise a sequel to Backwards...) And that at the moment happens to be books. First off is Incompetence, slated for release on the 31st December. Thank Back In The Red for reminding us all; it had been mentioned on various Dwarf sites a while back as Matt says, but everyone seemed to have forgotten about it. Including us. See BITR or Amazon for the synopsis; it sounds worryingly like an excuse for a load of pointless misguided PC-bashing, but surely Grant wouldn't subject us to that?

What we don't think has been widely reported is Colony II, due to be released bang at the start of 2005. No synopsis as yet. The first book had a mixed reaction from some (I'm afraid I haven't read it all yet, pathetic idiot that I am); some seemed to feel that it started well, but tailed off. Whatever; both books will be well worth snapping up purely for Grant's extremely amusing prose style, if for nothing else. Let's hope they're fantastic; they should be. I'm excited already.

Onto other business. The wonderful Austin Ross has pointed us towards this article on Cult TV awards. Red Dwarf is up for "DVD of the year", along with: Doctor Who Dalek Invasion of Earth, Edge of Darkness, Joe 90, and ST: DS9. Obviously, we hope Dwarf wins, although nobody can deny how spectacular the work done by The Doctor Who Restoration Team is - look at the article about the DVD up for nomination. And considering how popular Doctor Who still is amongst hardcore Cult TV fans... we can only hope.

Meanwhile, it's action stations at The White Hole. There's another contribution to the excellent Red Dwarf and Me. However, their latest project has also been released: Darkside of the Dwarf, concentrating on negative aspects of the show. It contains an interesting and mostly correct (in our opinion) article from Cappsy, and an equally interesting but completely wrong (in our opinion) article from a certain Julian Hazeldine; the premise of which seems to be that Red Dwarf is "has comprehensively failed to appeal to a wider audience". When you consider that the (admittedly highest) viewing figures for VIII was 8 million viewers (fucking high for BBC TWO; Red Dwarf frequently topped the weekly viewing figures charts for the channel), and that the DVD for Series I was second only to The Office for the biggest selling BBC DVD for 2002, the argument doesn't really hold water. And besides, it's a rubbish argument anyway; since when did something have to be popular to be good? It's almost as if it was written deliberately to annoy. Tsk.

As for our site, you'll notice that the ATVRD section (containing docs/links to various stuff to do with the newsgroup) has disappeared. That's because it's due a big refurbishment (due to me taking over a couple more documents) and it suits my personal site better. I'll put a link to it here in a few days when it's ready. What with this, and the removal of our woefully inadequate Schedule section, our poor navbar was getting a bit upset; so, to make it feel better, we're launching a new section tomorrow. Also up tomorrow: exclusive pictures of me acting like a cunt at Memorabilia. Excellent.

Ian's Newsround - It Is Ready.

Posted by Ian Symes. Sunday 27th July 2003.

Release The Smell Of Reeves and Mortimer on DVD now, please Yes, I'm quoting Demons and Angels again. The official site reports that work has now finished on the Series III and IV DVDs, with the following content confirmed:

No mention yet of isolated music cues, raw effects footage, trailers and such like, but I fully expect to hear about them soon. Some thoughts: It's good to see that the Easter Eggs will actually be secret this time around. Listing them in the booklet sort of defeats the purpose. It would seem that they are a tad better hidden than the last ones too, which is excellent. For once, it's an unpredictable choice of music for the featurettes, and two excellent songs. Not a Chumbawamba in sight. Shame there's only ten minutes' worth of Dimension Jump footage - there were almost 300 people there, so some are bound to be disappointed. I hope my contribution has survived the edit. Andrew mentions that there aren't any funny out-takes that we haven't already seen. Frankly, I'd like for them to all be on the DVD, so we can judge for ourselves.

Of course, the fact that they've finished the DVDs three months and six months in advance poses a few questions. One is: why finish now? Okay, budget is a factor, but they've got three months to put a collection of new Smeg Ups together. Of course, they could be finished early so they can work on The Movie, which I'm sure you'll agree is preferable to a few extra features. I'm nitpicking, I know. I should appreciate the fact that the DVDs are excellent as it is. I should look at what is there as opposed to what isn't there. I should also appreciate that the people compiling the DVDs are in fact human, and may want to take a break every now and that. Nevertheless, Andrew Ellard should stop his bloody moaning about how hard he works - I'll do the job for you, man!

The official site also brings news of a new book about Alternative Comedy, which, apparantly, is an umbrella that covers Red Dwarf. It seems that anything that's innovative and/or produced by Paul Jackson is in the same category as The Young Ones. Nevertheless, author Chrissie McDonald has secured exclusive interviews with Bobby Llewellyn and Dave Naylor, so I'm going to have to fucking buy it now. Also on the official site this week, Talkie Toaster talks to Kill Crazy. Hooray.

In other news, #44 of Better Than Life, the newsletter-cum-magazine of The Official Red Dwarf Fan Club has finally arrived at the homes of club members. There's a huge section of this year's Dimension Jump, the highlight being two and a half pages of my delightful prose. As well as this, there's the conclusion of a feature on the Smegazines, an interview with Emohawk's Stephen Wickham, lots of lovely reviews and analysis of The Inquisitor. Oh, just join the fucking fan club; not only do you get a lovely magazine, you also recieve a ten pound discount for Dimension Jump.

And finally, I'd just like to mention that I spent £180 on absolute tat yesterday. But then, it's all Red Dwarf-related tat, apart from the DeLorean, so it has worth. Expect the full report on Memorabilia within in the next few days.

The Empire Strikes Back

Posted by Ian Symes. Thursday 24th July 2003.

Brittas CoverYes, the shite puns have returned! And it's all in celebration of Series One of The Brittas Empire being released on DVD this week! I was hoping it would come earlier, but Royal Mail are INEPT, but nevertheless, I have written a (slightly late) review, and updated the Episode Guide with the full guest cast for Series One.

As well as this, we've also got a guide to the Red Dwarf A-Z, as we were getting a tad bored of writing about Series I. Plus, this helps with our goal to have something about every single DVD extra!

In other news, The Red Dwarf Zone has updated with what they say is a new, larger picture of the Series III DVD Cover. However, the BBC logo is too far into the corner, when compared to Series I and II, the two-disc set logo is extraordinarily shabby, the 'bonus material' blurb is in the wrong font, the edges of the Rimmer/Lister picture are appallingly edited, the old BBFC logo is used (they changed to a new set at the beginning of this year) and a PG certificate has been given, despite Marooned being classified as a '12'. Other than that, it looks fine. I would discredit it as a fake, but the version on the UK Shop has these same problems. I would guess that this pic is merely a larger version of this same early draft. The White Hole has also been updated, with some new content, some very bad news, and some excellent praise for us! Ta, Cappsy!

The next update will be on Sunday. This is due to two things: the final of Big Brother tomorow, and the Memorabilia fair on Saturday. Both John and I will be there, so expect a full report soon!

Actual Movie News (Updated)

Posted by John Hoare. Sunday 20th July 2003.

Red Dwarf: The Movie LogoNo clever headline today - let's get straight to the facts, as movie news has been preciously thin on the ground as of late. Friend of the website Karl Eisenhauer sent us a link to an article entitled Dwarf film in orbit, from the Herald Sun - which is Australia's biggest-selling daily newspaper, apparently. In which case you'd think they'd have enough resources to be able to tell the difference between a Doug Naylor and a Dave Naylor. But no matter - the point is that that the movie may be shot in Queensland, according to the Pacific Film and Television Commission; indeed, they have confirmed that he has been scouting there for locations. Whoever he is. Was that Dick Naylor? Etc.

Of course, the interesting thing about this is that Queensland is the home of the Warner Roadshow Studios. "Situated on 32 acres (13 hectares) adjacent to the Warner Bros. Movie World Theme Park, the Studios consists of eight sound stages, production offices, editing rooms, wardrobe, construction workshops, water tanks, commissary and a backlot of 230 acres (93 hectares)..." The studios also have an (admittedly slight) history of British productions; London Weekend Television have used the facility - but then, so have 20th Century Fox and Paramount. It looks ideal. Bear in mind that this is pure speculation, however. After all, it might not be the studios in Queensland they are looking at. Or they could just be location shooting in Queensland, and shooting in studios elsewhere. Or they could not even end up shooting anything there at all. Remember, none of this has been confirmed by GNP yet; until it is, we can only take it as rumour. Hmmm; I wonder if anything'll turn up on that website at some point...

But wait! More news, this time nicked from the ever-reliable The Red Dwarf Zone. They've noticed that AICN have reported that "Joining the production are producers Richard Keddie (TV mini-series "After the Deluge") and Jane Ballantyne (SELKIE)." They also mention the connection with Queensland; making the report seem more likely - but again, we stress that GNP haven't said a word. Check back in a few days for the launch of our Rumour Tracker section, detailing all the latest rumours about the movie, and whether they've been confirmed.

Onto site updates. Firstly, we have another episode review for The End, written by Tanya Jones. It's fucking excellent, and frankly pisses all over mine. We've also reorganised the reviews somewhat; they are now in alphabetical order, and have links to the various reviews at the top. It only took us three months to get some form of organisation there. And as for the big argument that was promised - take a look at The Debate: Series VIII's Setting. Ian is such a fucking cunt.

Don't forget that The Brittas Empire - The Complete Series One is released tomorrow. Ian'll have a review later in the week. I won't, as I can't afford it. Fucking wah.

UPDATE (21/07/03): Having just run this news story, I thought it might be an idea to e-mail the Vice President of Warner Roadshow Studios to ask if GNP are planning to shoot there. Lynne Benzine very graciously replied within 10 minutes: "Red Dwarf has not made any decision where it will be filming at this stage, so I am unable to give you any information." So there you go - the latest news about the movie, from those in the know. We'll get it to you, even if we have to make a pain of ourselves.

Ian's Newsround - Reminisces of a genius

Posted by Ian Symes. Saturday 19th July 2003.

He built a better universeWhat do you do when you've just made the second biggest selling BBC DVD of 2002? Why, you try and make sure the next batch are the biggest selling, of course! This is what GNP are doing right now, and once again, they've listened to the fans and are giving us exactly what we want. The lovely people at the official site have posted another DVD update - which is an excellent way of whetting our appetites while we wait for November 3rd. The extra which, for us, epitomises GNP's policy of giving the fans what we want is Building A Better Universe - the tribute to Mel Bibby. When the tribute was announced, we were expecting a brief montage and a caption. A full-length feature, featuring memories and obituaries from his former colleagues, is more than we could have dreamed of.

Also included in the mammoth update-o-detail are the titles of the documentaries - All Change and Built to Last. I'm sure you'll agree that these capture the goal of each series perfectly. The length of the documentaries has been shortened - they'll now be 75-80 minutes in length, not 90. Apart from ruining our football analogy, this doesn't matter at all. The documentaries are still huge, and all the deleted info will be included in the booklet. Following on from Play's revelation that the Series III musical featurette will be based on food, the Series IV theme has been announced as Lurve. Another chance to see Lister snogging various GELFs, set to Je T'aime, or something. Finally on the DVD-front this week, Backwards-Forwards, (which, incidentally, has been renamed twice), is to be seperated into a whopping twelves chapters. Good-oh.

The official site also carries an excellent interview with Chris Barrie this week, in preparation for Monday's release of The Brittas Empire on DVD. Chris reveals how he was the joker on the set, how Fegen and Norris left and how he felt about the new writers. Also, the new Better Than Life is supposed to be out now, but I haven't got my fucking copy yet. Bring back Nic Farey - he was never this late. Quite alarmingly, the front cover of BTL features Mike Tucker wearing friend of the website Karl Eisenhauer's deerstalker. Gentlemen, we have created history.

In other news, we've updated the DVD and Movie FAQ, in response to yesterday's news story. Our next update will be on Monday, and will feature, amongst other things, a bloody big argument. We at G&T command you to vote for Cameron, Scott and Steph to win Big Brother. We really hate potential-rapist Ray.

Best. Update. Evur?

Posted by Ian Symes. Thursday 17th July 2003.

See me now and tremble!We're not the type to blow our own trumpet, but in this instance the trumpet is particularly long and shiny. The other day, thanks to the wonders of eBay, I managed to buy the original shooting script for The Inquisitor. I'm sure you'll all concur when I say: "HOLY FUCKING TWATS!" Anyhoo, the upshot is this: "A page planted by non-believers to test our faith". It provides a lovely preview for the Series V DVDs...

As if that wasn't enough, we also have three more gorgeous chunks of loveliness for you. Firstly, an article all about the Series II Deleted Scenes. Anyone who is wondering why it took us so long to upload that, can fuck off. We've also got a review of Dark Ages, as we felt it deserved a re-appraisal. Hmm. Finally, Stephen Fletcher has very kindly contributed a review of The End. Remember, we're always looking to publish your thoughts, so get writing.


Posted by John Hoare. Tuesday 15th July 2003.

Draft Series III DVD Cover. Beautiful.Yes, have now got Red Dwarf III listed, and avaliable to preorder for the frankly ludicrous price of £14.99 including delivery. Blimey. They have also been known to deliver DVDs a couple of days before the official release date, so if you fancy a chance of getting it over the weekend rather than waiting until Monday (the official release date is the 3rd November), I advise you go with them.

The special features listed have little we didn't already know about, although it's nice to see that Smeg Ups, model shots, talking book clips, and music cues listed; we all knew they would be there as we were promised more of the same, but it's good to have confirmation. The one interesting mention is of an "Amusing Food featurette" - which is no doubt similar to the Drunk and Alternate Personalities featurettes. This would certainly explain the recent When Food Attacks article on the official site. I can't say I'm too excited about this; I personally find the featurettes to be a complete waste of time. But with so much other cool stuff, there's really hardly anything to complain about...

It wouldn't be G&T without pointing out all the mistakes on the Play listing, though - so here is a brief list (which we've also sent to Play themselves, so hopefully they'll correct it):

Not that we don't make mistakes ourselves, of course. Ta for those of you who point them out to us; we do appreciate the feedback. In other news, RDZ have scored a frankly impressive scoop to do with the non-appearance of, expected to launch late June. They got in touch with Norm himself - the final touches are being put to it, and it should launch in a week (indeed, the message on the site has now changed to "Appearing here very soon". Check out RDZ for the full response. They also have some news on the INTRO2 vid Clear's premiere.

Content update coming Thursday, and Ian will be around with his Newsround on Saturday. And finally, is this: great.

Dr. Graham told me everything

Posted by Ian Symes. Saturday 12th July 2003.

I'm trying to watch the film!It's Chris Barrie who plays the man, you know. As you've probably guessed, we've added a load of Confidence and Paranoia stuff to the Episodes section - reviews, scene summary and supporting characters. The actual capsules for this episode and Waiting For God will follow shortly. Before you mention it, only two updates this week is shoddy. But it's the summer holidays now! Plus, a new system which will allow us to post much more news is in development...

The official site reports that the BBC TWO repeats have been postponed for a fortnight. Fourteen days. Two weeks. Absolutely-dutely. This is shite, obviously. The repeats have instigated massive discussions on various internet fora, which has got to be good for the show. The official site also has an article about the use of food in the show, which is, as ever, marvellous. Once again, The Red Dwarf Zone has beaten us to a couple of newsworthy pieces - 'smeg' has been placed at #15 in a list of best sit-com catchphrases, and Amazon have listed the Series IV DVD. Spot the huge mistake in their listing - I certainly won't be ordering from them.

Thanks to Groovetown's Rick Mason for pointing out a spelling mistake in our previous update. Ironically, it was in a sentence about us correct spelling errors elsewhere on the site. Thanks, Rick, you little cnut. In other news - GET THE TICKLE! Jon is back in the Big Brother house! In your face, Leigh Loveday!


Posted by John Hoare. Monday 7th July 2003.

A photograph of a man dyingYes, I know there was supposed to be an update yesterday - I've been busy with another site. Ahem. Here is the much promised update to the DVD section - check the list later in the week for some more additions:

The last item needs a bit of explaining; when Ian originally wrote the reviews for the previous incarnation of the site, they were written in the first person. When transferring them to the current site, some factual and spelling mistakes were corrected, but more importantly, the reviews were changed into third person, to fit into the style of the site. Since then, we've decided that this was crap; reviews are better in the first person, and besides, the reviews capture a particular moment in time - changing them seems cheating, rather. So, the reviews are now in their original form; with grammar/spellings corrected, and footnotes added correcting the mistakes made. Is anyone still unclear as to the reviews situation? No? Excellent.

Onto news. We, and it seems every single Red Dwarf site in existence, have been mailed by a representative of the band INTRO2 - to make us make another gratuitous reference to their video for 'Clear', featuring Danny, Craig and Norm. But they deserve it, as they clearly know the Red Dwarf online community well. Hopefully now you will have realised why we've got such a bloody stupid headline, and are busy composing letters of complaint. Anyway, Back In The Red have got a short story on it, as have The Red Dwarf Zone. RDZ have also noticed that have got Red Dwarf III listed; it's given a 12 certificate. Presumably this is provisonal, although we can't see it going any higher. The White Hole has also had a couple of additions to their Red Dwarf and Me section. If you think we've been rather slow on the news front this time round, you'd be right; rest assured that things are happening behind-the-scenes to vastly improve this...

Finally, we have some important breaking news - Robert Llewellyn has revealed on his Guestbook that he's "just been down the 24 hour garage to get some washing up liquid". This could have serious implications; G&T will keep you informed.

Ian's Newsround - 90 Bloody Minutes!

Posted by Ian Symes. Saturday 5th July 2003.

Football - It's A Funny Old GameFor each of the previous DVDs, the total running time for extras, excluding commentary tracks, ran to about ninety minutes. For Series III and IV, they'll beat this with a single documentary. I've read the news story through several times to make sure I've got it right. I've also made my arms raw with the amount of pinching that has taken place. But no doubt about it - each series-specific documentary will be an hour and a half long. The features will be composed of thirteen (13) interviews - Mike Agnew, Chris Barrie, Howard Burden, tall genius Ed Bye, Craig Charles, Andrea Finch (Pennell), 'Fourth Dwarfer' Tony Hawks, Hattie Hayridge, Danny John-Jules, Gordon Kennedy, Bob Llewellyn, Ugod Naylor and Sir Peter Wragg. All the interviews were conducted by top workaholic Andrew Ellard, who, I can exclusively report, wore his lucky shirt on Saturday night at DJ. The Cat would not approve. Good job he's a fictional character, eh?

Another extremely intriguing tit-bit from the official site is the mention of one of the extras - Ace Rimmer - A Life In Lamé. Hattie Hayridge provides the narration in character as Holly, which is quite amazing. It makes our Hopping Holly article rather meaningless - GNP are finally giving Hattie the respect she deserves, and are acknowledging that she is part of Red Dwarf history. It is not clear whether the feature will deal with the fictional story of Ace, or whether it will be an account of how the character was created, but seeing as it's Holly commentating, not Hattie, we think it will be the former. Either way, it's yet another indication that GNP are striving to make this batch of DVDs the most original, exciting and in-depth yet.

As if these pieces of fantastic news, and the brilliant accompanying production pictures, weren't enough, the official site has also updated with an interview with Peter Scott, the chappie behind the Red Dwarf Arcade. From this, we learn that the online version of the arcade will be accessible on a subscription basis. This is a bit of a pisser, but it's understandable. After all, very few things that are of merchantable quality are free on the internet these days, and our view on Red Dwarf products is 'every penny spent improves the movie', so we'll definately be subscribing. Peter also gives details about each of the games that will be included. Rogue Skutters looks like a Lemmings clone - we approve. Moon Rescue, wherein you search for and rescue a stranded Kryten, sounds great too. This little collection could finally see me kicked out of college for inappropriate internet use...

Other interesting tit-bits... Series Two of The Brittas Empire has been listed at BBFC. 204 minutes - eeeeeexcellent. No sign of any extras yet, but then we have heard from very reliable sources that the BBC are being stubborn cunts about releasing additional footage to Eureka Video. Red Dwarf has been acknowledged as one of the influences behind The Matrix, which is great. All we need now is for Voyager to do the same, and our work is done. Thanks to friend of the website Karl Eisenhauer for that one. Norman Lovett's website still hasn't launched. Their definition of 'late June' seems to be 'any time in the second half of the year'. There's going to be a huge update to our DVD section tomorow. Well, unless someone leaves a suspicious package outside John's house.

And finally, in case you were wondering - ninety minutes = the length of a football game. Hence the picture of the author of the worst book ever written. Couldn't find one of Joe Klump, for some reason...

Fansite Updates and Me

Posted by John Hoare. Thursday 3rd July 2003.

Good news, everyone! Cappsy's site The White Hole has a great new section; Red Dwarf and Me, which has fans reminiscing about our favourite show. I'm sending in my answers soon; get in contact with him if you want to add yours. He also warns that his excellent Downloads section will be offline between the 6th-21st this month, so get downloading if you want anything now. He runs his own server, the git. In other fansite news, both Back In The Red and Groovetown have also been updated. The official Norman Lovett site hasn't appeared yet though, despite it being promised for late June. Wah.

Here at G&T we've continued to do some tweaking; hopefully you'll find the newly-added Quick Links on the navbar useful. Expect some rather larger changes in the upcoming couple of months, as there are some major things happening behind-the-scenes (indeed, it's one of the reasons why this isn't a very substantial update...) Don't forget the update on the official site tomorrow - we'll have our Newsround Saturday, and an extensive DVD section update on Sunday.

SFX Reader Awards

Posted by John Hoare. Tuesday 1st July 2003.

SFX Event logoSorry this news is a bit late; we couldn't afford to go to the SFX Event, or even buy SFX on the day of release. Wah. Anyway, as reported a while back, Chris Barrie hosted the SFX Reader Awards there on the 17th May, and by the magazine's own account, "'massive balls up' is an understatement." Apparently, "the entire video system conked out. It was bad enough that we couldn't show clips of the nominees; even worse, no-one got to see the acceptance speeches that were specially filmed for us...". Not that it mattered: " did give host Chris Barrie a chance to shine. He later told us he actually enjoyed the experience, ad-libbing his way through. He certainly earnt his money that night..." Excellent. Dave Golder (the editor) even thanks him for saving the ceremony, and "staying a gentlemen when he had every right to throw a star tantrum". For full coverage of it, buy SFX #106 (July 2003), out in shops now, which features a couple of great (but far too small) piccies of Chris himself. And best of all, no WRONG OPINIONS about Red Dwarf. As for the awards themselves:

There's also stuff about the Saturn Awards, where ST:TNG won the Best DVD Television Release award. Grrrrr. And there's a half-page advert for the upcoming Brittas Empire Series 1 release (on 21st July); good to see that it's being intelligently marketed. In other bits of news, Groovetown has a news story on Dwarf's appearance on University Challenge the other night. And all our June 2003 news stories are now archived, which means we can start with a fresh page of insulting everyone. Hooray!