"They're mostly nice people."
BBC TWO launched on 20th April 1964, started off with two and a half minutes of silence, broadcast from a cupboard-sized studio where the most sophisticated piece of technology was a phone that didn't work. But have things really improved? (SATIRES.)
On the 40th anniversary of the launch, the channel dedicated three hours to remembering the finest shows in its history. And The Office. Haha. Naturally, Red Dwarf featurred. Thanks to Simon Bromley for his transcribing skills:
CLIP:
The first few clips from the Series V title sequence.
[CAPTION: "Red Dwarf 1988-1999".]
GRANT:
[CAPTION: "Rob Grant, writer, Red Dwarf".]
All drama that had been set in space before then was very middle class. Nobody was ever sent to space who drank a pint of beer or had a curry.
CLIP:
More of the Series V titles.
LLEWELLYN:
[CAPTION: "Robert Llewellyn, 'Kryten'".]
Everybody in that period of television history, regardless of channel, every channel just said: 'It's not funny, it's not a sit-com, it's space, science-fiction isn't funny.'
CLIP: Back To Reality
HOLLY: Twenty five knots, thirty five, fifty...
RIMMER: It's coming straight towards us.
LISTER: There's only three alternatives. It thinks we're either a threat, food or a mate. It's gonna either kill us, eat us or hump us.
GRANT:
We had lined up to do it, we had Alan Rickman and Alfred Molina, who both said they were very interested in doing it, which was a great coup. And then we started getting nervous about that maybe they were too good and too big, and that, you know, by Series III, they'd be off in Hollywood being supervillains.
CLIP: Back To Reality
RIMMER: Uh-oh, speedbumps.
[The crew all bounce up and down on their seats.]
GRANT:
We wound up with a stand-up comic, an impressionist, a dancer and a stand-up poet!
CLIP: Back In The Red (Part One)
RIMMER: When someone's had a tad too much claret and has fallen asleep naked on their bunk, people of honour generally don't take a polaroid of your snoozing todger, draw a moustache, mouth and ears on it, and pin it up on the bulletin board under 'missing persons'!
GRANT:
When it first went on, it got really pretty good figures for a new series, which tailed away to pretty much nothing.
LLEWELLYN:
In Series VII, we got on the front of the Radio Times for the first time. So, you know, that was when we'd done seven series! (laughs) And they went: 'oh, alright, give 'em a cover!'
GRANT:
I don't think it ever got good reviews.
CLIP: Back In The Red (Part One)
[The CAT laughs as Starbug flies directly into the anus of a nearby rat. Starbug is bathed in shadows, as the crew look out of the viewscreen, disgusted.]
BARRIE:
[CAPTION: "Chris Barrie, 'Rimmer'".]
I started to notice, and in fact worry, when I would come out of the studio and you would see people standing there with 'H's on their head.
GRANT:
I've been to a couple of the conventions and, actually, for the most part, I hate to burst the bubble, but they're mostly nice people.
CLIP: Polymorph
LISTER: Please, I'm begging you!
[KRYTEN removes LISTER's boxer shorts, which are revealed to be doll-sized. RIMMER walks in on this, and thinks there's rudeness involved.]
GRANT:
The weirdest one I got was this strange guy, a sort of wide-eyed guy, who came up and he was very keen to meet me, and he presented me with a computer print-out, you know, one of those green and white ones, which had all my private details on it; I mean, it had my bank account number, my home address, my phone numbers. And he then invited me back to his car to show me his gun collection. (laughs) That was a very scary moment...
Good satires from Rob, there. It was really refreshing to see so much of him, since he's not spoken much of Dwarf since he left. It was a bit daft of them to surround his speeches with Series VIII clips, though; it makes you wonder if they even knew that he wasn't involved. Especially considering the slightly misleading caption of 'writer', rather than 'co-writer'. Robert Llewellyn was being his usual quirky, funny self. I'm sure Chris Barrie will be delighted that his sole contribution to the evening is a short sentence slagging off the fans.
The clips used were very good. Obviously, nobody likes Series VIII, but you have to admit that those two jokes are funny in themselves, and work well out of context as well as in. The Polymorph was in all its original non-Re-Mastered glory, which is great. Plus, no 'smeg'! Utterly surprising, but very welcome. There seemed to be a general avoidance of the obvious clips throughout the evening: we didn't see Basil smash up his car or insult Germans, The Young Ones on University Challenge or Ricky Gervais dancing.
The evening was a mixture of the excellent, such as aborted launch night footage, interviews with writers and directors, old RT letters and suchlike; to the shite, mainly new Dead Ringers sketches and ex-controllers talking as if they had any creative input into the shows during their reign. The Dead Ringers sketches were the worst thing, though - "look at that ident! The art department must be on TEH DRUGS!!!!1111".
Thanks again to Si Bromley for the transcript. Now, get on with your essay.
Comments
If you like, I could direct you to plenty of people who think last nights festivities were a load of crap. Me being one of them.
Posted by Mr Flibble at April 21, 2004 10:00 PM
Essays. Plural. AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGHHH!!!!!!
Posted by si at April 21, 2004 10:38 PM
I LIKE SERIES 8!!!!
Posted by MJN SEIFER at April 21, 2004 10:41 PM
You don't count.
Posted by Ian Symes at April 21, 2004 10:59 PM
MJN has turned into Vince off of Rex the Runt.
Posted by Darrell Jones at April 21, 2004 11:02 PM
Go on, MJN, say 'spaghetti'.
Posted by Ian Symes at April 21, 2004 11:07 PM
I watched the first two hours and enjoyed it, rather worryingly I could remember a number of things from the sixty's......All in all I think they struck up a reasonable balance although I thought they passed over the 'Young ones a Bit'..It was good to see a bit of Rob Grant being involved, but it was hardly worth Chris Barrie turning up with what was shown.
Posted by Cpt-D at April 21, 2004 11:20 PM
Yes, finally we get to see Rob Grant talk about Dwarf again. It's really funny that there were clips from Series VIII because Rob hasn't even seen the episodes (at least that's what he says publically...). Maybe he saw the opportunity with Doug being down under to sneak onto something Dwarf.
I hope he actually does get involved in the upcoming DVDs. The best extra ever would be half an hour of Rob and Doug sat in a room together, slagging each other off, reminiscing about Dwarf, and explaining PROPERLY about the split.
Posted by overmydeadbody at April 22, 2004 04:33 AM
I like VIII.
VII is complete tosh though :D
Posted by Drzymala at April 22, 2004 08:00 AM
Perhaps Rob is making his own Red Dwarf Movie while Doug is Down Under...
Posted by Mr Flibble at April 22, 2004 09:22 AM
I wonder if he meant:
GRANT:
When it first went on, it got really pretty good figures for a new series, which tailed away to pretty much nothing (by the time it reached series 8).
Posted by jesley carrion at April 22, 2004 09:59 AM
He seems bitter?
Posted by Joey at April 22, 2004 10:37 AM
I like series eight too. But, of course, you all knew that.
Posted by si at April 22, 2004 11:27 AM
Jesley, series VIII got huge ratings.
Posted by Cappsy at April 22, 2004 12:27 PM
Wasn't series 8 shifted about by the end of the series? Tennis tournaments, and whatnot?
I was under the impression that by this point, the figures had fallen dramatically. If that is the case, I'd love to blame the writing but I feel it had more to do with a crap THREE (!)parter followed by a crappier two parter.
Posted by Pete Martin at April 22, 2004 12:32 PM
Nope, the ratings were still toppo.
It was only the same-week repeats that were affected by overrunning sport, which meant 'Pete (Part Two)' was repeated in the slot that the 'Only the Good' repeat should have occupied, forcing the creation of an extra slot the week after.
Posted by Darrell Jones at April 22, 2004 12:42 PM
Actually, I think Only the Good was premiered on a different day of the week too (Monday?).
Posted by Darrell Jones at April 22, 2004 01:36 PM
Darrell, as your the man on figures, do you know of
anywhere you can get hold of viewing figures (I/E Dwarf I-VIII)....
I'm sure there was something on TOS, but I can't find it now...Things like BARB tend to be subscription only..And I would like to see other shows as well...
Posted by Cpt-D at April 22, 2004 03:29 PM
I like Series 8 as well. Mind that I was only 11 at the time and I then considered Star Wars Episode One to be the most incredible thing I'd ever seen... and I guess my opinion doesn't count either does it? :)
Posted by Andrew D at April 22, 2004 04:55 PM
I'm afraid I haven't a clue where to get ratings figures from, sorry. They're hopelessly inaccurate whichever way you look, though.
Posted by Darrell Jones at April 22, 2004 05:28 PM
Indeed, Thanks anyway, It's just nice to be able to bounce figures about now and then when people question the popularity of certain things..
I'm afraid I have to come down on the side
of Ser VIII support too although mistakes were made........
Posted by Cpt-D at April 22, 2004 09:45 PM
Indeed, Thanks anyway, It's just nice to be able to bounce figures about now and then when people question the popularity of certain things..
I'm afraid I have to come down on the side
of Ser VIII support too although mistakes were made........
Posted by Cpt-D at April 22, 2004 09:45 PM
Red Dwarf VIII was shown on thursdays throughout february and march 1999. However, episode eight was shown four days after episode seven, which played havoc with the repeat showing on the sunday night... Mind you, I will hold my hands up and admit that Only The Good is the worst episode of Red Dwarf ever.
I remember as I was filming a movie with Stephen Fry at the time, and was late back home.
Posted by si at April 23, 2004 12:56 AM
Try the programme guide (AKA the bible) for transmission dates. like the fact that most of series 8 was shown in the US before it was on over here. >:(
Posted by si at April 23, 2004 12:58 AM
http://us.imdb.com/name/nm1554482/
You're not bullshitting either!
Yeah, I remember now. The scheduling was only buggered up at the very end, possibly as deliberate sabotage to use its ratings as an excuse to axe it (conspiracy theory - yes, but it's happened before so can't be discounted).
Posted by Darrell Jones at April 23, 2004 12:33 PM
If anyone else doesn't like Series 8....
I'M GONNA SMASH YOUR KINKY BITS!
TIL YOUR FACE TURNS WHITE!
AND THEN I'M GONNA KICK YOU IN A POND OUT SIDE!
Posted by MJN SEIFER at April 23, 2004 01:18 PM
I remember watching the start of series 8, trying to convince myself that it wasn't that bad. I was saying stuff to myself like "that terrible line/situation doesn't count because it was in the computer program, not real life". I actually explained away the Reservoir Dogs bit like that, amongst others. Eventually though, as the crapness accumulated, the sinking feeling grew worse, and excuses became invalidated in various ways. I had to give in and declare with annoyance that Red Dwarf Series VIII was Shit. I didn't want to. I had no choice.
I watched that series with the same curiosity as a passer-by experiencing the aftermath of a car accident.
Posted by jesley carrion at April 23, 2004 03:05 PM
Anyway, pre-empting a later G&T report/update, I think they are really nice, but feel, not everyone will feel the same........
Posted by Cpt-D at April 23, 2004 04:12 PM
Sittng here baffled over all these posistive comments directed towards RD8. I'd understand if you've never seen an episode before, but you can't deny that it aims for a TOTALLY different humour than anything previously seen. Completely with Jesley on this one.
Posted by Pete Martin at April 23, 2004 04:25 PM
re: Darrell's comment above - that really IS me! That was the movie I was filming with Stephen Fry while RDVIII was on!
Posted by si at April 24, 2004 11:00 AM
I watched "Only The Good" for the first time in ages, and it was so bad it even insulted my intelligence. If it got any worse it could have ended up on ITV. Series VIII has been discussed to death so I'll save you from an essay and save me from vomitting in utter rage. Adios.
Posted by Twister at April 26, 2004 03:27 PM
I think me and Ian should review all of VII and VIII, so you can all have the CORRECT OPINION.
Posted by John Hoare at April 26, 2004 03:29 PM
The funniest thing about VII and VIII was the CGI. Oh yeah, I went there.
Posted by Twister at April 26, 2004 04:10 PM
"ALLS TEH ITV CONMEDY IS AN SHIT!!112" *yawn*
Posted by Darrell Jones at April 26, 2004 04:17 PM
That hurts, man.
Posted by Twister at April 26, 2004 04:32 PM
>I think me and Ian should review all of VII and VIII, so you can all have the CORRECT OPINION.
Please do. I look forward to it.
While you're at it, can you (or someone... I'll do it if you want) review the books properly? I can't be the only person who thinks they're worthy of as much, if not more, attention as the TV series.
Posted by Seb Patrick at April 26, 2004 10:18 PM
I agree; I'm deeply ashamed of our books section. They're on the list, which is currently the size of Kryten's in the episode of the same name.
Posted by Ian Symes at April 26, 2004 10:28 PM
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